.....from Barry's Bunker.....

(with thanks to Harry The Cat)


A blind man was waiting to cross the road when his guide dog peed on hisleg.

He reached into his pocket and took out a biscuit for the dog.

A passer-by who'd seen everything remarked: "That's very tolerant of you after what hejust did."

"Not really," came the reply. "I'm just finding out where his mouth is,so I can kick him in the nuts."

A young newly married couple inherited a parrot from an aged relative.

This parrot was very talkative, and was forever informing visitors as to whatwent on in the newlyweds' home.

One evening, after a very embarassingcomment from the bird, the husband had enough and said to the parrot, "that'sit! You will be covered up much earlier in the future, and if you take yourcage cover off or embarass us again, you will be sent to the Zoo."

A couple days later the couple were preparing for a short trip, and asusual, the suitcase was too full to close.

So the husband said, "I'll get ontop and jump up and down and you see if you can get it."

After a bit the wife said, "This is no good. I'll get on top and you seeif you can get it."

This still did not work, and so the husband said, "Tell you what, let'sboth get on top and bounce up and down - that'll get it."

With this, the parrot pulled off the cage cover and said, "Zoo or no zoo,this I have got to see."