.....from Barry's Bunker.....

(with thanks to Harry The Cat)

"Confucius Say........"

Man trapped in pantry have ass in jam.
Virgin like balloon . . . one prick, all gone.
Baby conceived in automatic car shiftless bastard.
A bird in hand makes hard to blow nose.
Find old man in dark, not hard!
Man who smoke pot choke on handle.
Ok for shit to happen . . . will decompose.
Man who put head on Rail Road track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.
Sailor who gets discharged from navy leave buddies behind.
Secretary becomes permanent fixture when screwed on desk.
Don't drink and park, accidents cause people.
He who crosses the ocean twice without washing is a dirty double crosser.
Man who tell one to many light bulb jokes soon burn out!
It takes many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.
Never raise hands to angry child, it leave groin exposed.
Woman who cooks carrots and peas in same pot is unsanitary.
Man who fart in church sit in his own pew!
Man who eat many prunes, sit on toilet many moons.
Those who quote me are fools.
Man who drive like hell bound to get there!
Man who keep feet firmly on ground have trouble putting on pants!
Man who stand on toilet is high on pot!
Man who sit on tack get point!
Man who runs behind car gets exhausted!
Man who jump off cliff jump to conclusion!
War not determine who's right, war determines who's left.
Baseball very funny game--man with 4 balls no can walk!!
Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.
Woman who ride bicycle in city pedal ass all over town.
A girl's best asset is her 'lie'ability.
Support bacteria -- it's the only culture some people have!
Man who eat jellybean fart in technicolor.
Man who lay girl on hill not on level.
Man who marries a girl with no bust has right to feel low down.
Man with athletic finger make broad jump.
Squirrel who runs up woman's leg not find nuts.
He who fishes in another man's well often catches crab.
Man who speaks with forked tongue should not kiss baloons.
Man who lose key to apartment not get new key.
He who sitteth on an upturned tack shall surely rise.
Even the greatest of whales is helpless in middle of desert.
Man who argue with wife all day get no peace at night.
Man who lay woman on ground have peace (piece) on earth.
Wash your face in the morning, neck at night.
Man who walk through airport door sideways is going to Bangkok.
America Good Place to Put Chinese Restuarant.
Man who drop watch in toilet bound to have shitty time.
Woman who dance while wearing jock strap have make believe ballroom.
When lady say no, she mean maybe

when lady say maybe, she mean yes

when lady say yes, she no lady

There is no such thing as rape; Woman run faster with skirt up, than Man with pants down.
Man who take lady on camping trip have one intent.